I know to some of you right now this sounds like total hokus pocus stuff. Don’t feel bad if you do. I used to feel the same way until I started to analyze my thoughts and speech. What I found was so shocking to me I changed me for good. You see 9-10 years ago I used to struggle with depression and suicidal thoughts. I have to admit as hard as it is to do so, I was a hot mess. Volatile, always sensitive, my feelings always got hurt, always felt alone and hopeless. Everything I attempted to do in my life was always falling apart. It just felt like I was destined to fail, it was like if I was fighting against a wall that I would never conquer.

Ever Felt that way?  It’s horrible isn’t it? It’s one of those feelings where you tell your self, if this is all I got to look forward to in life, what is the point of being alive!  But you see there was something I was indeed missing and no one had taught me what it truly meant. “For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.” Proverbs 23:7  This passage talks about the stingy man who invites one for a meal but his heart is not in it. His mouth says “yes eat all you want I’ll foot the bill” but his heart says “Ugh! I hope he doesn’t eat me out of house. Money is hard to come by these days”. Sound familiar? We all have that internal dialog that often contradicts everything our mouth says. It is that internal dialog that programs us to expect good or bad. 

In our mind we create our truth about our life and our word. If we’re constantly saying “I can’t afford that” , “Good things never happen to me” guess what? that becomes your reality. Not because of magic but because we’re telling our sub-conscience to FOCUS on that very thing we don’t want in our lives. It is what we focus on that we get good at. So when we focus on being broke, depressed or in pain we become excellent at being broke, depressed and in pain. We create a mastery program on 1 million and 1 ways to fail and stay stuck.

Yes this was me! I was constantly replaying in my head all the failures and struggles, all the reason I couldn’t move forward till I believed every single one. All my decisions from that moment became about trying to protect my self from impending doom. Only causing an even bigger catastrophe every time. I was not living life I was trying to defend myself from it. Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? but that is indeed how many of us live. Like if we need to defend ourselves from it. “It me against the world”.

When I realized this all started to make sense to me. So I started to change my tune. No It wasn’t some miraculous thing either. I simply decided to become aware of my internal dialog and it wasn’t hard at all. When  I caught my self thinking something negative about my self or saying something negative about my circumstance, I stopped to think what it was I was telling my self. So if my dialog was  “you’re so stupid, why is it taking you twice as long to learn this” I would proceed to ask my self “am I really stupid?” the answer is No. What I discovered about my learning style #1 is that I am dyslexic and thats my gift. Yes my gift! I don’t see the world as black or white. I see the world in 3D with lots of colors and depth. So while one person only sees 1 solution to a problem I see 100’s. So to compare my analytical process with some one else was just foolish of me. I was trying to put myself in a box when God created me to be completely out of the box. He created me to challenge the status quo not follow it, to be a big eccentric dreamer. To create things no one ever would dare to do or even think. To be risky. That’s me. The was Einstein, Leonardo Da Vinci, that is also the story of Charles Swab, Richard Branson and many others. We weren’t crazy or dumb we were just created to see the world from a different perspective. Had they allowed themselves to fit into the mold of society we wouldn’t have the amazing contributions they’ve made to society.

When I changed my internal dialog my life was transformed. Not only did I overcome depression and have never needed another ounce of medication, but I began to accomplish things I never thought possible. Businesses, awards, new and amazing relationships, leadership opportunities and the list continues. All because I changed what I was looking at.

I want you to start programing yourself to think different. On a piece of paper write down every negative thought that you have about your self and your life. next to that write down the truth (the opposite of the negative you wrote). Now read that positive truth. Every day for one week read those words. then erase the negative words and just read the positive to your self everyday. after a few weeks you will see and begin to speak life to yourself and you will see how you will begin to change your life not by magic but because you’re now focused on the path you truly want to take.

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